Monday, September 21, 2009

BREAKING UP IS HARD TO DO......OOOOOOOOOO

How To Breakup…When It’s Over

Author: Tonja Weimer

Did you ever breakup with someone? Did you try to avoid causing them pain? Breaking up can be hard to do. These are the kinds of letters I find in my email box everyday:

Dear Tonja,

My boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for two years. But I know I’m not in love with him. I don’t want to hurt his feelings. How to I breakup without causing him pain?

Dear Tonja,

I have been in a relationship with someone for over a year that I don’t know how to get out of. Recently, I started seeing someone on the side that I really like but I feel like I’m cheating on the girl I don’t want to hurt but don’t love.

Help!

The main theme in the above letters is that the people don’t want to hurt anyone. Since everyone’s worst fear is rejection, no one wants to be the person who inflicts that imagined wound on another.

Would you like to have a better sense of “breaking up” etiquette? Would you like to know what’s appropriate, what isn’t, and the mature way to handle a difficult situation? Here are the major points to keep in mind when you know it’s over—but you know the other person doesn’t want to hear it:

1. Step up

Just as you worked your way into this relationship, you are going to have to work your way out of it. It’s not fair if you send an email, leave a post-it note, send a text by phone, or tell a friend to deliver the message. Nor is it fair to distance yourself emotionally and/or physically, waiting for the other person to break up with you so you can remain blameless in the situation. There is no easy way out.

It is also not fair to let someone hang out with you in a relationship, thinking you are committed when you don’t want to be there. This is far more hurtful and damaging to the individual than a mere breakup. You are preventing that person from moving on to find their soul mate by your chicken-heart. Don’t do this—to them or to yourself. You both deserve better. Do the RIGHT thing.

2. Show up

It is required that you show up in person and as a human being to deliver your breakup message. Keep it simple, succinct, and to the point. Do not defend your decision or explain yourself or be guilty if you don’t want to be in this relationship. There is no law that says you have to remain together—nor should you. Here is a short example of what you might say:

“As you may have recognized, I’m not feeling that this relationship is working for me. I think you are (give the person an acknowledgement here.) Thank you for (list a few things you are feeling grateful for.) And at this time I’m going to be moving on. It works best for me if you don’t call or email.”

Then, say goodbye and mean it. There is no point in dragging out the conversation or trying to be “friends” or saying things like “if you’d have come along at another time in my life, this might have worked out.” When one person wants the relationship to be a romance and the other doesn’t, these kinds of messages just muddy the waters. Further, you cannot extend a friendship. That’s just another way of trying to soothe your conscience about breaking up— and another inauthentic way for them to hang on, hoping you will have a weak moment and change your mind. Make it a clean break so you are both free to find other people.

3. Face up… to the lie in “rejection”.

It’s time to face up to the false thinking of being rejected…or, rejecting another. When you are the one telling someone that the relationship is over…that isn’t rejection. That’s important information you both need to know so you can both move on.

If you have ever been afraid of “rejection”, remember this: don’t make yourself emotionally vulnerable to someone before you know the person well. Keep good boundaries while you determine if you can trust them with your feelings. If you’re telling someone you’re in love on the first or second date, you aren’t in love with that person—you’re in love with your IDEA of that person. If someone you thought you had mutual feelings for suddenly says they don’t want to be with you… guess what? You don’t want to be with them either. This is a matter of dignity and self-respect.

Breaking up IS hard to do, but that goes with the territory in relationships. If you have the heart to fall in love, you have to find the grit to break up when it’s clear you don’t belong there.

About the Author:

About Tonja Weimer:

· Columnist: Weekly syndicated singles and dating columnist (over four million readers in the U.S. and Canada)

· Media: Coverage on TV, including CNN’s ShowBiz Today; rave reviews in USA Today, Entertainment Weekly, Publisher’s Weekly

· Author: NBC/USA TV Network, selected author for articles on dating and singles for website

· Articles: In House Beautiful, New Woman, GRAND, and other national magazines

· Coach: Master Certified Singles Relationship Coach; Associate Certified Life Coach; International Coach Federation; Relationship Coaching Institute; Institute for Life Coach Training

· Keynote Speaker: Regional, National and International conferences in U.S., India and Europe

· Academic: BA; MA in Human Development; U.S. Dept of Mental Health full fellowship

· Published Author: 7 Books(Fingerplays for Children; Creative Movement for Children, etc) winning over 25 awards.



Visit Tonja's website for more exciting dating tips!

Singles Dating Tips Online

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - How To Breakup…When It’s Over

Friday, September 18, 2009

A mother talks about discovering her sons are gay.

My Gay Children - A Parents Perspective

Author: title="Susan Dean" Susan Dean

Finding out you have gay children is for most of us unsuspecting parents a life changing experience.
How much it changes our life depends on many factors. I know personally how it does change your life as I do have gay children.


I am a mother that has been married for 26 years to the same man and have 2 wonderful sons from that marriage.
I still remember from a very early age that I would marry a man and have a family of my own. My children would grow up in a happy home and they would one day find the love of their dreams and settle down, get married and have children and then the whole cycle would continue on the same from there.


How your life, your views, your ideals and your dreams of the future can change in an instant. I have learnt that nothing is set in concrete when it comes to life. When I gave birth to my children I had somehow forgot that I was giving birth to two individual little human beings not clones of my husband or myself.


This can be a hard concept to handle for some of us especially when your child or children in my case come out of the closet so to speak and tell you that one is gay & the other bisexual.


Wow! In fact this can be disastrous.
This closet that they have just climbed out of, well,we've just climbed in!


All of a sudden, your life is nothing like it was or what you expected it to continue to be. For some of us it is a real shock or maybe it is a relief. See, we are all different from each other even though we are the same.


We will all react differently, some very badly and some ok, and some only just ok. For most of us this is mind blowing news. What will we tell our friends and family? Will they shun us, hate us, laugh at us or will they support us?


We don't really want to find out because we are scared of what they may say or do.That's why we go into that closet.


We may be angry because our child has brought us into something we don't understand and don't know how to handle. Confrontation can be a very difficult thing to handle especially when it is about something that is not accepted with in the majority.


Our religious beliefs may start to confuse us as we may need to choose between our religion and our child.
Many may feel repulsed and disgusted because all they can think about is the actual sexual acts that they think their child will be participating in.


There are so many reasons that parents are confused and upset or saddened because their child has said they are gay.


I know I was shocked and also relieved when I first found out about my eldest son. But I new I couldn't change him so I just wanted to find out more about homosexuality and help him survive in this homophobic and cruel world.


It's funny, that I was under the conception that everyone would not accept our son or us and yet I couldn't have been more wrong. Sure, society in general are not so accepting but the people that mattered to us are.
It takes guts to come out of that closet that our child was in. Once we saw how very brave and courageous our son was it made it easier for us to also come out.


In may ways the full circle had come around because once we were there to teach and guide our sons and then the tables turned for them to guide and teach us. For that we are very proud.


It can be difficult for us at times and none so more than when our second son told us he was bisexual. This was a shock once again but not a relief as with our other son. I felt a little isolated as I had two gay children not just one. My family is not unique in this. There are many families with more than one child being gay.


The important thing for us was to band together and support each other. Talk and learn together. Sure it took awhile for us to fully come to terms with this but it has strengthened our relationship and made us more understanding and tolerant towards others.


Life is a funny thing sometimes. Often it takes something of this nature to put life into perspective and remind you of what is really important and of what isn't so important. Our children are and always have been the most important thing in our lives.


The fact that they are safe, healthy and happy means everything to my husband and myself. We have been inside that closet and we have come out of that closet.


Because of the family that we are we are truly blessed.


About the Author:
Susan Dean (Debbie) has two sons, one is gay and one bisexual.Her website < a href="http://www.gayfamilysupport.com">http://www.gayfamilysupport.com is full of relevant information and stories from parents who have gay children.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - My Gay Children - A Parents Perspective

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I have trouble sleeping..and you?

Fall is a Good Time to Re-establish Good Sleep Habits

Author: Tova

As the days get shorter and nights longer the natural triggers for sleep and waking – light and dark – day and night – are in transition. It’s back to work and back to school and a good time to re-evaluate your sleep habits and make adjustments especially if you are experiencing problems.

Our lives are built around schedules. Whether we like it or not, without regular work hours, nothing in the business world would get done and no learning could take place at schools. You wouldn’t be able to schedule a doctor’s appointment or reserve a table at your favorite restaurant. The world would be in a tizzy! The universe of nature functions on a schedule also, evidenced by day and night, and the seasons of the year, and are bodies were designed to be in tuned with nature to function at their peak.

It’s not that critical at what time you eat or when you exercise, but when it comes to sleep a regular schedule is a must. Most of us don’t realize how important a regular schedule is to ensuring that our internal sleep clocks don’t break down and destroy our ability to fall asleep naturally, and sustain sleep for 6-8 hours so we can wake up feeling refreshed.

We set our external clocks to wake us up at the same time 5 days a week to arrive at work on time. But we seem to push the envelope every night when it comes to going to bed at the same time, and on the weekends we totally throw our clocks out the window. Soon our whole internal timing mechanism, which is the electronic part of our make-up, has been thrown off (like a watch whose battery is running low) and we develop sleep problems.

Getting sufficient sleep is so important to how productively we will function the next day and how healthy we will be, that it cannot be over stressed. The danger to destroying our body’s internal mechanisms, which trigger sleep, is that it can take a long time to restore them and many of us get stressed in the process and further aggravate the problem. Unable to cope many people turn to external drugs, which they see as a much needed quick fix. And the pharmaceutical companies are all too happy to oblige us spending millions to advertise their miracle solutions. But no drug that enters the body comes without serious side effects or risk of becoming habit forming – making the solution more elusive and far off. Besides, we have our own natural drugs to keep our body functioning as it should when it comes to sleep– we just need to be able to tap into them – and that is the job of our internal clock.

So don’t fall victim to what seems easy. You need to correct the underlying problem which is that your internal clock is malfunctioning and needs to be re-tuned. That takes careful attention to your personal habits and to creating a work-life schedule that respects your body’s need for sleep above all else. Fall is a good time to incorporate this strategy into your life because there is more time to devote to sleep. Remember that your sleep clock is cued to induce sleep and then wake you up by the natural triggers of light and dark and it’s darker longer this time of year.

Life will be pleasant when you are in sync with your body clock so take good care of yourself and re-charge your batteries regularly by sleeping well.

For more information on good sleep hygiene and avoiding problems check out: http://www.TheSleepGenie.com

About the Author:

Tova Greenberg is Founder of The Sleep Genie Inc.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Fall is a Good Time to Re-establish Good Sleep Habits

Monday, September 14, 2009

Older woman with a younger man...

Older Women in Love With Younger Men: Can it Last?

Author: Tonja Weimer


Have you ever dated a younger man? If you are a man, have you been seeing an older woman?


The older woman/younger man duo is more prevalent today than ever before. But this couple also faces some challenges. Some remain as a strong couple, but others disintegrate. Have you wondered why some older woman/younger man relationships last and others do not?


Here are some of the main reasons a couple falls apart, and what you can do to prevent it:


* A different vision for their lives.


Many couples who come to counseling express that they had one idea of what they thought the marriage should be and then discovered too late that their spouse had another.


Take some time and ask each other what you would have your life be if you had the ideal situation and partner. Ask what each of you expects of the other in a relationship. Write your answers on paper first, and then share them with each other.


* Different values.


You say that you value family relationships, and you have a close relationship with your family members. Your love interest says they value the same thing, but he or she never calls anyone in their family and they do not make plans to go and see them. How will this difference play out for you over time?


Make a list of the top 10 most important values to you and note if your beloved shares and demonstrates those same ones.


* Conflicting messages.


Conflicting messages will drive you nuts with the "come-here-go-away" attitude. One minute your partner is telling you that you are the most important person in the world to them. They are convincing and you believe them. The next minute they are unexpectedly running out the door, breaking your plans for the evening, to be with an old friend.


Develop your boundaries about what is okay with you and what is not. If you have an agreement with your partner and they break it, you need to let them know how you feel and then take appropriate actions. (Have clear cut, realistic expectations of each other; make sure your plans are stated clearly; have the hard conversation about what each of your priorities are and what you can expect from each other.)


* Communication.


This one seems obvious, but it isn't. The strength of any relationship lies in communication. Too many people walk around, not having the commitment they want or knowing where the relationship is going because they are afraid to ask. They don't want to hear what they think the other one might say. Whether you are the older woman or the younger man, after a reasonable amount of time, you deserve to know the intentions of your beloved, and the depth of their caring. In most cases, if you don't ask, you don't receive. And if you don't hear what you need and want, you need to move on, because you deserve someone wonderful.


All of the issues for a older woman/younger man couple seem to wind up in the domain of communication. If there is strong chemistry, values, shared dreams, and interests, communication makes those qualities stronger.




Visit http://www.tonjaweimer.com or http://www.singlesdatingtips.com for more tips, skills, and insight on dating, relationships, singles, and love. Subscribe to our F*ree Savvy Dating Newsletter from master single's coach, life coach, and syndicated columnist, Tonja Weimer. Copyright 2006, Tonja Weimer. (Please note source if reprinting this article.)

About the Author:

About Tonja Weimer:



· Columnist: Weekly syndicated singles and dating columnist (over four million readers in the U.S. and Canada)



· Media: Coverage on TV, including CNN’s ShowBiz Today; rave reviews in USA Today, Entertainment Weekly, Publisher’s Weekly



· Author: NBC/USA TV Network, selected author for articles on dating and singles for website



· Articles: In House Beautiful, New Woman, GRAND, and other national magazines



· Coach: Master Certified Singles Relationship Coach; Associate Certified Life Coach; International Coach Federation; Relationship Coaching Institute; Institute for Life Coach Training



· Keynote Speaker: Regional, National and International conferences in U.S., India and Europe



· Academic: BA; MA in Human Development; U.S. Dept of Mental Health full fellowship



· Published Author: 7 Books(Fingerplays for Children; Creative Movement for Children, etc) winning over 25 awards.







Visit Tonja's website for more exciting dating tips!


Singles Dating Tips Online

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Older Women in Love With Younger Men: Can it Last?

Sunday, September 13, 2009

The Angry Child

An interesting article filled with great tips~ Amber Columbia


Child and Adolescent Anger: Ways That You Can Help Right Now

Author: William DeFoore, Ph.D.

What do we do about the violent adolescents? Good question. Here are some possible answers. Angry children need love. The older and angrier they get, the harder they are to love, and the more frightening they can become. If you have an angry teenager in your home, extended family, your child’s school or your community, here are some ideas that may help:


· Do everything in your power to get to know them.


· Find out what they like to do and do it with them. That’s a stretch in some cases, but do the best you can. They will notice the effort. Stay true to yourself—if they see you trying to become like them, they’ll lose respect for you.

· Ask them to tell you about the things they’re interested in. You may have to prove that you’re really interested before they will open up, but if you’re sincere and persistent, they will start talking.

· Be a steady, loving presence in their life. You may have to forego some of your other activities, but if you have an adolescent who is possibly moving toward violence or suicide, it’s worth it.

· Get in touch with your own healthy anger, so that you have the personal power and confidence to deal with the energy of adolescent anger.

· Work to master humor and love. Find as many ways as possible to have fun with the adolescent and show your love. Make sure that you are pursuing the relationship for them, and not to fulfill some unmet needs from your own past.

· Consult with other adults and parents who are good with teenagers. Watch how they interact with kids and learn from their example.

· Pray. You’re going to need all the help you can get, and you need to know you are not alone in your mission to bring love to this unhappy child.

EMBRACING THE OUTCASTS AND MISFITS

This is simply impossible if you have outcasts and misfits in your own subconscious body/mind. So the first order of business here is to make sure you have found, embraced and made a place for the children within you that you or others may have found that represent remnants of memories that you have yet to resolve. These are the inner children that symbolize your pain, shame and self-doubt.

Rest assured that the outcast child that you approach in the outer world will not accept your embrace if they see unresolved fear and anger in your eyes or actions.


Since we know that the outcasts and misfits are the children most likely to become violent, it only follows that we must pull them into the arms of love and/or acceptance, and find a place where they fit. If our system doesn’t have a place where a child fits, there’s something wrong with the system, not the child.

Look around you in your family and your community. Do you see the outcasts and misfits? The ones that seem to have no friends, or who only hang out with others like them? Look for the ones that don’t act “right,” are too this or too that or not enough of the other. Especially look for the ones that are not talking about their feelings, and seem to carry a lot of depression and/or anger.

Genius often hides in such places. If you are wise, healthy and dedicated enough to win an inroad to the heart and mind of one of these “personas non grata,” you may discover a hidden treasure. The movie “Good Will Hunting” depicts such a case, where an angry, violent misfit is also a gifted genius. The older movie “The Breakfast Club” also shows us the beauty in the shadow of the misfit.

Kindness and compassion will sometimes be greeted with doubt, fear and even anger at first. If you really mean it, and have the courage to do so, you can penetrate that outer shell and touch the tender heart within. You may be saving someone’s life.
Consider the outcasts and misfits in your world to be unexplored territories of your own soul, undiscovered treasures waiting for you. The rewards will be as great for you as for those you help.

When we look deep enough into any living being, we find the face of God.

Teach this to your children, like Max did in the following example.

Max had come to me for almost four years, to heal from a very painful childhood, and to learn to manage his anger toward his wife. He was making excellent progress, and was tapering off in his sessions.

Max’s son Derek was six years old, and the apple of his dad’s eye. Max was determined to give Derek the healthy guidance, love and positive role modeling he had never received as a child.

Smiling ear to ear, Max told me of some of his recent successes with his wife and son. “I have always been afraid I would end up homeless and living under a bridge. So, I decided to confront this fear a little more directly. After church Sunday, Derek and I took about 40 hamburgers to the homeless people living under the overpass downtown. Derek loved it! Now he wants to feed all of the homeless people in the city. Those people were so grateful.”

Max was quiet for a moment, as he wiped his eyes and regained his composure. He had given a great gift to some outcasts and misfits, to his son, and to himself.

METHODS FOR HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH THEIR ANGER

· What to say—When your child is in the middle of expressing anger, your verbal response is extremely important. Though it remains true that your non-verbal signals will speak more loudly than your words, we must not underestimate the power of the spoken word, particularly during intense emotional experiences.

o For a very young child, or if the anger is being expressed mostly in non-verbal ways, say something to the effect of, “Wow! I can see that you are really angry right now. I’m sure you have good reasons to be angry. Your anger seems really strong to me. I want you to know that it’s okay with me for you to be angry, and I want to help you deal with it so that nobody gets hurt—including you.” In these and other words, communicate the idea that “There’s nothing wrong with feeling anger, the important thing is what you do with it.”

o Practice reflective listening. Repeat back to the child what you hear her saying in a non-judgmental, soothing tone. This provides a comforting effect, and lets the child know she’s being heard. Start with phrases like, “So what I hear you saying is…” or “So you’re saying…” Stick with their words and references, using as little interpretation and as few of your own words as possible.

o Express empathy and understanding. This is simply a matter of imagining yourself in the child’s position, and attempting to see things from his viewpoint. Use phrases like, “When I put myself in your shoes, I can see why you would feel that way,” or “From where you stand, it looks like…” or “I think I see what you mean” or “That makes sense to me.”

o Avoid teaching, correcting or instructing while your child is angry. Only when the child starts to calm down and relax, you may want to share some of your own similar struggles or experiences. The goal is to help them deal with and understand their anger. Discipline needs to be kept separate from this kind of communication, and administered when both you and the child are calm. That way the child gets the clear message that it is not their emotion that is being disciplined, it is their behavior.

· What to do—If your child is small enough, you might want to try holding her during her anger episode. This has been found to be highly effective in many cases. It provides loving, powerful and safe boundaries when the child is feeling out of control. The non-verbal message is, “I’m here. I’m not going to leave you. I’m not going to hurt you, and I won’t let you hurt yourself or anyone else. I’m going to hold you until you feel safe again.” Here are some recommendations to make this procedure safe and successful:

o If you are extremely afraid or angry yourself, do not try this technique. Your emotions will feed the anger and fear of your child and make the situation worse.


o If you feel comfortable doing so, hold the child from behind, ideally with him sitting in your lap. Protect your face in case he tosses his head back toward you. The goal is for no one to get hurt.

o There needs to be both love and power in your embrace. Strong but not too strong, relaxed but not too relaxed. This lets the child know you are in charge, that you love her and can and will protect her.

o Be ready and willing to devote some time to this. If you don’t complete the process, you may do more harm than good. Hold the child, and wait until he calms down and relaxes. Often he might cry or even fall asleep as the anger subsides.

Through this gesture you are communicating love, acceptance, safety, protection and power all at the same time.

· What to have the child do—In some cases, the child may need to release anger physically. This can be accomplished in a number of ways:

o Supervised play with toys, or play therapy in a professional setting, can be very effective in helping children release anger. The violence that occurs between the toy characters is non-destructive, and can be very informative to the therapist and/or the parent who is observing. This can also include drawing pictures, or throwing clay against a wall or board where no harm can be done.

o Hitting pillows or a mattress with a harmless object such as a nerf bat or bataca bat. This can be done in a playful manner, and the child will still receive benefit. In therapy, I often call it “the anger game,, so that children feel safe in approaching the activity.

o Children may sometimes benefit from the “temper tantrum technique." Parents should use their own judgment as to when it is necessary to contract for the services of a professional for this type of exercise.

o One of the best parents I know told me that he had his daughters use the “Name it, claim it, aim it” technique for dealing with anger. In other words he taught them to put a name on their feeling, take responsibility for it, and direct it into some kind of release or constructive activity. An example might go something like, “I’m angry and sad, Daddy,” (naming and claiming it) “and I want you to help me talk to Bobby about taking my things” (aiming it). This is an excellent approach, and I highly recommend that parents use this and any other guidelines they run across that help them to teach their children to manage and express their emotions in healthy ways.

About the Author:

William G. DeFoore is a counselor, executive coach, author and speaker. He has 34 years of experience in helping people achieve healthy, happy relationships. Get free information, watch videos and purchase books, CDs and downloads at AngerManagementResource.com .

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Child and Adolescent Anger: Ways That You Can Help Right Now

Saturday, September 12, 2009

9/11: Opening the Wounds to Heal the Pain

I'm typical of most Americans who were deeply effected by the terrible events and loss of thousands of lives on 09/11/2001. I remember where I was and the disbelief of everyone around me as we sat in the College coffee shop watching the large screen televisions. There were tears and screams as we watched the second tower get hit and then both collapse. Although we were in far-away northern New England, protected on the 'Hill Top' and our "faith seeking understanding", our collective shock soon gave way to a palpable fear.

All across America, people were waking to the surreal news, and all across the world, telephones rang and people as some discovered that their lives were shattered; their loved ones were dead and thy and the world would never be the same again.

We all have stories and I can not even imagine the stories of the heroes, families, and survivors but for those I have read or seen in the news. Each and every one of us alive on that day will be forever changed.



On this 8th anniversary, "A Somber Obama calls for Renewal"...and actor Charlie Sheen, once again, brings up the ideas of conspiracy and coverup.



Charlie Sheen and others feel there has been a cover-up by the previous administration. Many Americans have wondered how much was known and if there were military actions on 9/11 that have been covered up as well.

What are your thoughts? Are we adding salt to the wounds of the American people, the families and friends? Or is there a TRUTH that we need to know?

Amber Columbia

Saturday, August 29, 2009

School Uniforms, I'M FOR THEM!

Editor's note:
School uniforms, in my opinion, help to take the competion, "keeping up with the Jones" and other social stigmas out of school. A child isn't wearing hers/his social economic status on his/her sleeves. Considering news reports stating that children have been mugged, and some killed for sneakers, watches, etc I would think parents would be happy with this approach.

School uniforms are more economical, too. No matter what your income level may be, wouldn't you like to spend less on dressing your children for school and perhaps putting more of that money toward their futures?

This is a serious consideration. Does your child really need to be an "individual" in dress or is the child's intellectual future and individualism really the goal. Critical thinking has little to do with clothing and accessories.
Amber Columbia,

Editor

Pros and Cons of School Uniforms

Author: Isaac Grauke

We have worked with schools across the United States, and
believe us, you are not the only person asking this question!
The answers that we have heard from our customers are as varied
as our customers are. The debate over school uniforms is
complicated, so we've included highlights from both sides for
you to consider:


Professional:


Some say that a child in a school uniform is more likely to take
school seriously. Putting on the school uniform signals he or
she is going to school just like dad dresses up to go to work.
Schools report that when students dress in "work clothes" rather
than "play clothes" they take a more serious approach to their
studies.


Promotes Good Discipline:


Many think that school uniforms help maintain school discipline,
decreasing the amount of discipline problems. The argument is
that children today are lacking in self-discipline because
parents refuse to discipline them. This makes it more difficult
on the teacher who has to deal with classes of 25-30 students at
a time.


Reduces Fighting and Violence:


Schools report that school uniforms decrease fighting and
violence that arrise out of arguments over fashionable clothes.
Children invariably tease those who do not have trendy clothes.
Those who can't afford name brand clothes are often sensitive
about their clothing. Schools struggling with gang problems
report that school uniforms help ease tensions.


Distractions:


Many parents believe that students wearing school uniforms look
nicer and that a school uniform policy ensures that children
will come to school in appropriate clothing, avoiding
distractions such as fads considered to be outlandish or overly
revealing. Some students have turned school into an unending
fashion show. This disctracts from learning, as some kids spend
more time focused on thier clothes than on homework.


Values:


School uniforms stress that individuality and self-expression
are not determined by designer clothing or the latest fashion
fad.


Low Cost:


School uniforms are a bargain. They are becoming far less
expensive than many other clothes. Schools argue that school
uniforms are economical, especially compared to designer
clothing, and parents agree given school uniform durability.
They say school uniforms last longer because they are made for
repeated wash and wear. Many schools capitalize on this by
starting used school uniform stores or swap meets. Parents can
get used school uniforms at discount prices, or just use them as
hand-me-downs between siblings.


School Spirit:


Some feel wearing a school uniform helps build school spirit. It
instills a feeling of belonging. As the Beach Boys said, "Be
true to your school." Schools report an increase in school pride.



Individuality:


Supressing individuality is the most commonly cited objection to
school uniforms. Educators argue that an academic program
encouraging students to pursue individual thought is much more
important than what they wear. They inhibit creativity and
self-expression, forcing students to conform.


Causes Discipline Problems:


Some students reject any rules. Forcing them to wear school
uniforms only aggravates their rebelious spirit. They alter
their school uniform by tightening, widening, shortening, or
lengthening them, and teachers are given the impossible task of
policing the students on a daily basis.


Little or No Relationship to Academics:


Opponents insist that their is no credible evidence that school
uniforms improve school discipline or promote higher academic
acheivement. The principal argument is that some great students
are terrible dressers. Dress does not necessarily improve
learning.


About the Author:
Isaac Grauke is manager of sales and marketing for Hall Closet
Uniforms and Apparel, http://www.hallclosetuniforms.com

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Pros and Cons of School Uniforms

Friday, August 28, 2009

Make Homework SEEM like less work....

How To Make Homework Less Work

Author: howcastmedia

Check out the video version of this guide on Howcast.com:
How To Make Homework Less Work

Get more great studying tips at Howcast.com:
Classes and Studying

You Will Need:
  • Homework
  • A well-lit work space
  • And your favorite tunes
Step 1: Pick spot

Pick a spot where you can do your homework every day. Clear it of any potential distractions.

If possible, do your homework in natural daylight. Research shows that people who studied near a sunny window had grades about 25% higher than those who didn’t.

Step 2: Listen to music

Listen to music. Studies have found that, for some people, playing their favorite tunes helps them get through homework faster by acting as “white noise” that drowns out distractions.

Turn off your cell phone. You can hear all about what happened to your friend’s ex-girlfriend at the amusement park after you finish your homework.

Step 3: Take notes

Take notes while reading. Writing down key points can improve your recall.

Step 4: Snack

Snack on carbs, like pretzels and popcorn, while you do your homework. They boost serotonin—a brain chemical that makes you calmer and helps you focus.

Step 5: Chew gum

If you don’t feel like snacking, chew gum—it activates certain chemicals in the brain that help improve short- and long-term memory.

Choose mint gum—research shows minty scents help you stay alert.

Step 6: Take breaks

Take breaks! Keep the oxygen flowing to your brain and avoid eyestrain by getting up every half hour and moving around for at least five minutes.
Now back to work.

Did you know? In education-obsessed South Korea, it’s common for students to study 18 hours a day.

About the Author:

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - How To Make Homework Less Work

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Making Money on Line

Make Money Online: 5 Powerful ways to make money online

Author: samantha

I have been working online since the beginning of 2005 after starting my marketing career offline a few years before that. I love making money online and the idea that I can be on holiday in an exotic location and have to just answer a few emails is what I would call real bliss. At the end of the day to run an online business and make serious money online all you need is a working laptop/computer and an internet connection.

I remember back in 2005 sat in a internet cafĂ© on holiday in Lanzarote checking on my emails as I was selling numerous information products on eBay and was making sure that everything was ticking over whilst I was enjoying myself. It is also the idea that you don’t need to have any staff in order to run your own business. The idea that I can work solid one day and then take two days off is certainly the biggest thrill that it offers me.

I have several different streams of income that allow me to make money online. Some are better than others as they take less time and energy. Those that you have to put the extra effort into are always the most rewarding just because of the pain and passion that has gone into the creation.

Here is a list of my best ways to make money online:

One page information sites: This is where you create a one page site of information that people will need to know on a daily basis and cover it from head to toe in Adsense. To be able to make a decent profit you want to have at least a hundred of these and they require absolutely no maintenance and can be forgotten for years to come. They could cover things like maps for holiday destinations, calendars, local area events or even software that people are desperate to get their hands on.

Affiliate Marketing: Just by writing a review for someone else’s product can seriously increase the amount of money into your PayPal account. Aim for products that are new and not those that have already been oversaturated in the market as you want a prime position in Google. If you own a website why not include a couple of banners or a review on a customers download page.

Blogging: I personally love Blogging and if you can write a simple Blog Post there is lots of money waiting for you. Create small little niche sites with lots of Adsense and make sure that your Blog Posts reflect what is being currently searched in the search engines and you have it made. When your Blogs are doing well and you are earning a regular income from it you can get Blog posts written for you for a rather low amount so in effect you can have an automated business with very little work involved.

Article Writing: Just by writing 5 articles a day and then have a link through to one of your products can seriously increase your sales. They say that if you do write 25 a week so that’s 5 a day Monday to Friday you can expect to make $1000 in your first 30 days. However as your popularity grows and your reputation increases for being a accomplished writer you will earn much more than this.

Forum Marketing: This is my personal favourite you just NEVER knock the ability to build a business through the likes of internet forums. I use them most days and through answering a simple question and telling the person that I am replying to that they can find the answer on my Blog I can add over 100 clicks in a matter of minutes. This can work in any niche too and doesn’t just have to be associated with the make money online niche.

Social Marketing: This has to be the most powerful way of gaining traffic through to your products and services. As a member of many of them including Twitter, FaceBook, Digg, StumbleUpon and Yahoo Answers I have seen first hand how much they can help your business day in day out. By answering a quick question on Yahoo about Hostgator I can create at least $200 in affiliate commission. Using bookmarking sites like StumbleUpon and Digg has had an amazing affect on the amount of sales that I have received and placed me in the search engines a lot quicker than I could have possibly imagined.

I have now provided you with five excellent ways to make money online. I have to say without a doubt even though these are not the only ways they are my best ways to make money online. Just think about which ones are yours!

About the Author:

Samantha Milner is a well-known Internet Marketing expert and the owner of my easy online pay that gives free internet marketing tips to all:

"Become a Internet Marketing Expert Today!"

Head over to http://www.myeasyonlinepay.com to get your FREE advice now!

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Make Money Online: 5 Powerful ways to make money online

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

OH, MY FACE, what is happening to my face?


Years ago, a rather rude fellow walked up to me at a gallery opening and loudly asked "My God, what has happened to your face? It is FAT!" I flushed, and said little. It was a matter of shock and embarrassment, had I changed that much in just a few years? The answer was YES. Facial weight is one of the most difficult cosmetic problems I have had to deal with and it has been a struggle since my mid-thirties. This article is quite helpful.
Amber Columbia

How To Lose Face Fat

Author: Chung Leong Yu

Here is a fact that you should take note of. What do you look at first when you meet somebody? You look at their face first right? For example you meet up with old friends, colleagues, your neighbor or new friends, most of the time you will focus your attention on their faces first.



The point is that the face is very important and that is also why so many people are looking for ways to lose face fat. Any weight loss will show on the face first and when people look at your face, they will straight away notice changes. Plus, influences from the media and the entertaining world also create an impact on how a pretty or sexy face should look like. If you just would flip through the magazines, the faces of the models are all very slim and well defined with high cheekbones, sharp nose and a lean face.



Well, since so many people is looking for the answer to lose fat in their faces, here is a couple of tips on how to lose face fat. Before we move on to that, lets understand that there is no such thing a spot reduction. This means that if you are looking at a miracle pill or gadget that can get your cheeks down, you will be disappointed.



If you want to lose face fat, you have to begin with losing weight. This means losing excess water retention and also losing body fat. Usually, when a person loses weight, it is very noticeable that his face also gets sharper and leaner. Usually the face will slim down first because excess water is gone. Follow these simple steps to lose weight and you will get a lean, healthy and toned face.



Lose Face Fat Step 1: Drink lots of water.



You have to drink lots of water to stay hydrated. Drink at least nine 8-ounce glasses of water a day. Drink more than that if you are an active person and always exposed to the sun. The thing is our body has a natural protective system. When you do not drink enough water, the body will naturally think that you are stranded in a dessert and have not enough water. As a result, it will store as much water as it can to keep you living and there is when you will get bloated. Vice versa, if you drink enough water, the body will flush out all the unnecessary water because it knows that the system has enough water. Stick to plain water. Sodas and sugared drink would not help because they contain sugar and will lead to bloating too.



Lose Face Fat Step 2: Do not forget your fruits and vegetables!



Stay natural and eat at least three servings of fruits and three servings of vegetables every day. This will not only fill you up with less calories and help you stay way from junk food, fruits and vegetables also contains water that can help you stay hydrated. Plus, they are filled with fiber that gives many health benefits. Make your self a healthy fruit salad for snack instead of a chocolate bar. Choose your fruits carefully though; control the amount of bananas, grapes and pineapples because they are high in fructose. Go for apples, oranges, all sorts of berries and grapefruit because they are low GI carbs and they packed full with anti oxidants.



Lose Face Fat Step 3: Reduce the alcohol



It does not matter what alcohol you drink. Wine, brandy or beer, alcohol is still alcohol. Alcohol can cause a good amount of bloating in the body because it really dehydrates the body. It can also add inches in you belly and under your chin because one gram of alcohol contains seven calories! That is almost like drinking fat! A five ounce glass of wine has 100 calories, that means a little drinking a little bit can add inches in your waist.



Lose Face Fat Step 4: Bump up the calcium



A lot of studies have proven that taking at least 1200 milligrams of calcium from dairy if possible daily can help in fat loss. There is also a study that showed that half of the females in that study experienced reduced symptoms of PMS including water retention after consuming 1200 milligrams of calcium. So, do not eliminate dairy in your diet, have some in moderation.



Lose Face Fat Step 5: Calories out more than calories in.



This is the golden rule of fat loss. In order to lose weight, you have burn more calories than you consume. So, the easy and healthy way to do this is to burn 250 calories and reduce 250 calories from your food intake. The reason to reduce 500 calories a day is because we need to hit a reduction of 3500 calories a week and that will result to healthy recommended weight loss of one pound of body fat per week.

To burn 250 calories, just go for a simple walk or jog for 30 to 40 minutes. To reduce 250 calories, just eliminate all the junk food and excess fatty foods from your diet right now and I am sure you can reduce 250 calories. Eat healthy and eat with a mind to feed your muscles and body with good fuel!



Lose Face Fat Step 6: Control Your Salt Intake



Salt is another culprit of water retention. That is why when you snack with junk food that is high in sodium, you will feel every thirsty and your face will bloat up the next day. Avoid foods like pizza, burgers, junk food, chips and other similar foods because they are loaded with salt! When eating out, be careful of the gravy, some gravy use a lot of salt. Eat home and prepare your own food when ever possible! Sprinkle your salt, do not use your spoon, that way you can really control the amount of salt that goes into your food!



Lose Face Fat Step 7: Go For Weight Training



You have to weight train to maintain and increase lean muscle tissue. With more muscles packed in your body, your metabolism will increase and you can burn more calories and fat! Plus, with more muscles in your body, you can burn more calories while you do your cardio and even while rest because muscles are living tissues and require calories to function and survive! For optimum fat loss results and to lose fat on your face, you have to diet, do your cardio and also weight train.



So, if you want to lose fat on your face, the main objective is to lose weight. By losing body fat, you will look much leaner and have a much more cut features because fat and water under the skin is reduced.



So follow these simple steps and get on a fat loss program now. Mark my words; if you manage to lose body fat until your desired body fat, your face will look much leaner and thinner. Even your nose will look sharper!

About the Author:

Yu Chung Leong is an experienced and motivated personal trainer for many years. He is passionate about health and fitness and enjoys helping people achieve their fitness goals. He writes many free weight loss tips at http://www.lose-fat-tips.com

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - How To Lose Face Fat

Saturday, June 27, 2009

The Tin Whistler in my GARDEN by Amber Columbia



Every year, the Tin Whistler and I venture forth in search of just the right hosta, an unusual perennial plant, or a funky little garden ornament. She is a potter who makes beautiful naked raku vessels; I am a painter.

We met many years ago when I was 17 and our boyfriends were neighbors so of course, we 'double dated'. Years passed and boyfriends somehow turned into husbands.

From the moment I met the Tin Whistler I liked her. She was quiet, actually very reserved, but had a great gift for attracting friends. Her friends were usually outgoing and often opinionated (like me!). Over the years I met quite a few of her friends; many have become mine.

This year's pursuit took us many miles. She drove us, despite the threat of rain, far into the Helderburg Mountains, near the upper Catskill Range in New York state. The location wasn't new to either of us, we have been regular visitors to the Helderledge Nursery for over 15 years. We roamed the grounds and made our way into the hosta area and found the hostas that were to be ours. Hosta Blue Mouse Ears is now MINE and I added Paul's Glory, although I think I purchased it on a previous visit, too.

The next day, the Tin Whistler and I followed each other to a nursery that had been written about in the New York Times a few days earlier. It's the Loomis Nursery in Claverack, NY. Claverack is about five miles off the Taconic Parkway near the Hudson River. Loomis' prices were DEAR, very dear. Their container gardens were as wonderful as the Times author had stated, but prices on the individual perennials were out of our range. Our time together was sweet, I enjoyed every moment of her company.

Almost a year and a half ago I didn't think I would enjoying a gardening day with my friend, again. She is a cancer survivor of the greatest grace and dignity. She waited months before 'worrying' anyone with the news that had shocked her and her husband. The Tin Whistler was suffering from cancer of the salivary gland. It's a rare cancer, and especially rare in women. What was worse was that two of the four expert institutions who reviewed the pathology said it was a melanoma.

The Tin Whistler is an eternal optimist and went with the optimistic reports and began the treatment for salivary gland tumors which consist of radiation and other medications and monitoring. She told me something I didn't know~ once the treatment is over, life doesn't return to the way it was prior to CANCER. She said that doctors continue to monitor your progress on a regular basis and any mark, ache, or pain that you experience brings the fear back into your heart.

The Tin Whistler doesn't dwell on any of this. She is living her life to the fullest~ performing in Irish sessions throughout the Capital District of New York; searching for the perfect hosta for her garden, and offering her brand of love and friendship to all. I'm one of the luckiest people on earth to have the Tin Whistler in my garden!


Paul's Glory


Mouse Ears


Gateway to the back portion of the Tin Whistler's Garden.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Wheat free, Gluten free, and FEELING BETTER.

Wheat Free Foods: 5 Tips to Find Tasty Baked Goods

Author: Lillea Woodlyns

The increasing awareness about wheat and gluten intolerance has led manufacturers and bakeries to create more gluten and wheat free foods.

The biggest sellers are usually cookies, breads and other traditional baked goods. But do these new wheat free and gluten free alternatives taste as good as the products they are trying to mimic?

Not long ago, commercial wheat free baked goods were often tough, gritty and over-priced.

The new generation of wheat free and gluten free baked goods can be quite affordable, with a much better texture. When real foods are used as ingredients, not simply a hodge-podge of gums and other questionable fillers, the taste can actually rival or even surpass the wheat foods they are substituting.

But there are still many icky products on the market, unfortunately. When you buy from a good company or bakery, the product still might not taste very good.

So how do you find the tasty wheat free baked goods, the ones that might even fool a die-hard wheat lover?

Here are 5 tips to get you started:

1. Read reviews online. There are many online stores that sell quality wheat free and gluten free products. The better web stores usually have a place for customer reviews.

2. Contact your local Celiac group and ask for a list of recommendations. Often they will have a list of local bakeries, restaurants and several online sources for good wheat free and gluten free baked goods.

3. If you like to bake, visit Amazon.com and read reviews of wheat free and gluten free cookbooks. Or search for blogs that offer recipes that readers have reviewed.

4. Call local bakeries to find out if they offer wheat and gluten free options (rice flour products are the most common). If they do, visit and ask for free samples.

5. Make sure that the ingredients in the product are foods and flavors that you (or the person you are buying for) like the taste of.

'Wheat free' does not guarentee that it's also gluten free. Gluten grains also include spelt, kamut, rye, triticale and barley. Oats are often contaminated with wheat, so they are out for most gluten and wheat intolerant folks as well.

Wheat free and gluten foods can be tasty and easy to find if you know where to look. As the awareness of wheat and gluten intolerance grows, the demand for quality wheat free and gluten free products and recipes will grow too.

About the Author:

Many Wheat free foods that taste great can be found at http://www.wheatfreefoodsonline.com

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Wheat Free Foods: 5 Tips to Find Tasty Baked Goods

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Child Abductions Happen EVERY DAY!

Teach Your Child to be Smart, not Scared

(Preface and notes by Amber Columbia June 24. This morning, I was enjoying TWITTER, posting and reading TWEETS when I saw something disturbing. This TWEET:   @tweetmeblack Where's Jada? Missing #Black Child Ignored by Major Media http://bit.ly/1410s5 Help Find #jadajustice PLS RT!   I googled Jada Justice and found very little and I didn't remember seeing anything on the news. So, I began to RT, Re-Tweet. There is passion and love for this little girl on TWITTER. "tweetmeblack" helped to focus attention on an abduction that occured 2 weeks ago. The FBI has been involved from the beginning, but the major media outlets had seemed to look the other way. Tonight,CNN is covering the story on line. To the best of my knowledge, Nancy Grace was the only major personality to discuss Jada Justice's abduction prior to today.

Jada's disappearance is every parent's nightmare. The little girl's cousin-baby sitter left her alone in a car while she ran in to get cigarettes. That's how quickly a tragedy can begin.

Chris Lowrey's article suggests ways to help prevent abduction. For additional resources please refer to:
America's Most Wanted  National Center for Missing and Exploited Children  FBI Crimes Against Children )


Adam Walsh

_________________________________
Author: Chris Lowrey
Have you ever experienced the absolute horror when you are in a store and you lost your child? Or, your child lost you? Terror runs straight through your entire being! The what if's start flowing and, although we try not to, most of us fear the worst... Our child could have been stolen!

The majority of the time our fears are quickly calmed by the sudden appearance or discovery of our child. But, what if...


Every family fears a stranger taking your child. We all know that this is rare and the exception but it does happen. If even one child is taken in a lifetime, that is one too many.Yet, we also fear teaching our children to be scared to death of every stranger they meet.

Is there a happy medium? Child development will determine the steps to take. For example, if your child is very young, the chances of them being anyway other than your arms, is unlikely. But, your nine year old is prime for coming into contact with strangers.We want our children to be safe at all times but we also don't want them to avoid strangers altogether.Therefore, as a family, have a continued dialog regarding stranger danger. As the child gets older, modify and add on to your conversations.

Parenting Tips

Always carry a recent photo
·
When you are in large crowds, dress your children in bright clothes
·
Tell your children to yell! If someone is trying to take your child, teach them to scream, "This is not my parent!"
·
Make a rule about accidental separation. Tell your child that if you get separated, they are to stay put, you will find them.
·
If your child is feeling frightened, teach them safety check points. For example: if they are walking home from school and begin to feel unsafe, show them safe neighbors that they can run to. If you are in a store and someone is "bugging" them, show them where the registers are.
·
Remind them that most adults are wonderful people. Adults will normally help a child at any given moment. However, if an adult wants to take them somewhere without your permission or touches in a "yucky" way, tell your children that those adults may be unsafe and to get away quickly. As the parent, you will figure out the adult decisions to make after it happens. You simply want your child to get away.

· Assist your children in being polite to strangers. There are many incredible people for them to meet in their lives. However, if a stranger tries to give them anything, touch them or encourage them to go with them, get away from that stranger and tell an adult.

· Alert children to drivers asking directions. Adults should only ask other adults for directions (if, for example, your child is playing outside.) If a driver tries to ask directions or has something exciting in the car for the child to see, tell the child to run!

Parenting is the most all encompassing component of your life. It is a phenomenal responsibility. More than anything else in the world, we want to keep our children and family safe. But, we also want our children to be open to meeting new people. If we teach them safety and empowerment, as their child development stages emerge, they will feel comfortable with the safety precautions you have taught them.

About the Author:

Chris Lowrey commits herself to family and writing. Several of her books have been published and she now holds the position of Editor of Family Time Charm.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Teach Your Child to be Smart, not Scared

PMS? REALLY?

PMS or princess?

Author: Kylie Welsh

A male friend asked me recently if PMS was just an excuse for women. "Excuse for what?" I asked. "You know, so a woman can be more…difficult, than usual."

Since when do we need an excuse? I jest, of course, but PMS is complex and an area of female health that is rife with misconceptions. It is also an area women feel embarrassed to talk about and partners can feel unsure how to broach.

I spoke with Nirala Jacobi about this. Nirala is a qualifed healthcare practitioner with over 10 years experience. She recently wrote this article on PMS to help women have a more thorough understanding of what is happening in their bodies when experiencing PMS and how you can manage this both effectively and naturally.

"Why am I so angry?"— Understanding PMS

When it comes to PMS and other menstrual disorders, women are often frustrated with the lack of understanding and proper care they receive from conventional sources. "One week before my period, I’m so irritable I could rip my husband’s head off" is a frequent statement. Oral contraceptives seem to be the one-stop treatment of choice for many of these complaints and although artificial stabilization of hormones can bring relief for the issues of PMS, it does not find the cause of the problem.

Natural medicine has much to offer for PMS sufferers, as it targets the root of the problem. In my practice in Brisbane, I help women unravel the cause of their particular PMS symptom picture.

Let’s take a look at what’s going on.

PMS symptoms start 1-2 weeks before the period. These include:

  • Breast pain

  • mood changes such as anger or depression

  • headaches

  • acne

  • digestive complaints such as bloating, constipation, or diarrhea

  • weight gain and water retention

  • sugar cravings

  • fatigue often 1-2 weeks before the period

All symptoms must resolve with the onset of the period to be classified as PMS or something else is going on.

Hormonal Balance

From the first day of the period to ovulation (typically around day 14), oestrogen rises slowly and declines after the egg is released from the ovary. In a normal menstrual cycle, progesterone is the main hormone after ovulation—it helps to offset some of the strong effects of oestrogen.

A common finding in PMS sufferers is an elevated oestrogen/progesterone ratio in which oestrogen is abnormally elevated compared to the level of progesterone. This can be due to an inefficient liver clearance of oestrogen or mild progesterone deficiency.

Another reason why progesterone is low in the 2nd half of the cycle is stress. Stress raises a hormone called cortisol. When stress is continuous, progesterone is taken from the menstrual cycle to convert to cortisol. This is a protective mechanism, as the body thinks it is running from a tiger. It considers cortisol more important than the reproductive hormone progesterone.

Irritability and Depression

Not only can high oestrogen cause all of the symptoms of PMS, but an elevated oestrogen/progesterone ratio has also been shown to impair proper neurotransmitter synthesis such as the "feel-good" serotonin. This may be due to oestrogen depleting B6 levels which is a necessary vitamin to produce proper serotonin levels.

B6 levels are frequently low in depressed patients, especially those taking oestrogens such as the birth control pill or menopausal medication such as Premarin.

Anger is also often experienced by women with PMS. Energetically, anger can be a frequent sign of liver congestion and oestrogen overload.

Oestrogen Dominance

The total amount of oestrogen in your body is determined by

  • how much you make yourself (technically, all oestrogen starts as testosterone and is converted in the ovaries or fat tissues—known as endogenous oestrogen)

  • how much comes from the outside (from hormones in animal products, chemicals in cosmetics etc—known as exogenous oestrogen)

  • and how well you detoxify both

Too high oestrogen is known as oestrogen dominance, a condition associated with PMS, breast cancer, uterine fibroids, and endometriosis.

Other Hormonal Influences

In addition to the above mentioned effects, excess oestrogen has also been implicated in a rise in aldosterone secretion from 2-8 days prior to menses, causing fluid retention, a common complaint in PMS. Endogenous and exogenous oestrogen can also increase prolactin secretion by the pituitary gland. Elevated prolactin has been linked to progesterone deficiency, breast pain, fibrocystic breast disease, and hypothyroidism.

Hypothyroidism affects a large percentage of women with PMS, and should therefore not be underestimated. If symptoms persist, a simple blood test can identify blatant thyroid dysfunction.

Natural Approaches to PMS

It is always important to know what type of PMS you are experiencing before embarking on a treatment plan. The suggestions below are just examples of a wide variety of professional treatments.

Diet: In my practice, diet and lifestyle recommendations are always the foundation on which I build my treatment plan. I often start the treatment with a cleansing diet for 2-4 weeks, after which I focus on specific diet changes. Depending on the symptom picture, a typical dietary recommendation for a patient with PMS may be to reduce all animal products to decrease exogenous oestrogens as well as saturated fats. To put this into context: vegetarian women excrete two to three times more oestrogens in their faeces and have 50% lower free oestrogens than their omnivore counterparts. Overall reduction of fat, sugar and salt all have been shown to significantly improve PMS symptoms in some women.

Liver Detox: The liver is a very important organ of detoxification. Oestrogens are detoxified through the 2 main detox pathways of the liver. Abstaining from alcohol, caffeine, chemicals and processed foods can lower the total detox burden of the liver. Cruciferous vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, cabbage) contain Indole-3-carbinol—a potent compound that aids in the liver detoxification of oestrogen. This is also available in pill form from a qualified naturopath.

The Gut: Another important aspect of PMS treatment is to establish proper bowel flora. To detoxify oestrogens, the liver binds it to glucuronic acid which prevents the reabsorption of oestrogens from the bowel. Certain undesirable gut bacteria produce the enzyme beta-glucuronidase which cleaves this bond and allows these oestrogens to re-enter the circulation, adding to the total oestrogen pool. Increasing fibre and adding probiotics to the treatment protocol can be very beneficial.

Exercise and stress reduction have been clearly documented in the literature for reducing symptoms of premenstrual syndrome.

Specific Herbs and Nutrients

A professional naturopath has many herbal remedies and nutrients to design an individualized treatment plan.

By far the most commonly used herb in PMS is Vitex agnus-castus (Chaste tree berry). It is so effective in regulating menses and lowering prolactin it has been written up in Europe’s prestigious "German Commission E", a scientific database on herbal substances

B6 and Magnesium are important for proper serotonin production especially in cases of oestrogen dominance. It also seems to help with sugar cravings before the period.

Ten Tips for Women with PMS

Here are a few tips from Susun Weed’s best-selling book, NEW Menopausal Years the Wise Woman Way (Alternatives for Women 30-90) to help ease these discomforts.

TO RELIEVE WATER RETENTION

  1. 10-20 drops of dandelion root tincture in a cup of water with meals and before bed.

  2. A strong infusion (one ounce of dried herb in a quart of boiling water, brewed overnight) of the common weed, stinging nettle, not only relieves, but also helps prevent further episodes of water retention. Weed says she drinks a cup or more of this infusion daily whenever she wants to nourish her kidneys and adrenals.

TO MODERATE MOOD SWINGS

  1. Tincture of the flowering tops of fresh motherwort is a favourite calmative of herbalist Weed. She uses 5-10 drops in a small amount of water as a dose, which she repeats as needed, sometimes as frequently as 3-4 times an hour, until the desired effect is achieved. "I never feel drugged or groggy or out-of-it when I use motherwort to help me calm down," she says.

  2. For women who consistently feel premenstrual rage, use 20-30 drops of motherwort tincture twice a day for a month to help stabilize mood swings. Make it a priority to take a moon day - one day right before or at the start of the menstrual flow which is set aside for you and you alone.

  3. One or more cups of an infusion of the herb oatstraw (the grass of the plant that gives us oatmeal) helps the nerves calm down and provides a rich source of minerals known to soothe frazzled emotions.

TO RELIEVE CONGESTION AND TENDERNESS IN THE BREASTS

  1. 20-30 drops of the tincture of cleavers, another common weed, works wonders. This plant, also called "goose grass", was used as a black tea substitute by the colonists. The dose may be repeated every hour or up to 6 times a day.

  2. Women who get a lot of calcium and magnesium from their diet (leafy greens, yoghurt, and many herbs are rich in these minerals) have less breast tenderness. Increase the minerals in your diet with a cup or more of red clover/mint infusion daily.

  3. Large cabbage leaves, steamed whole until soft, and applied as warm as tolerable, can be used as a soothing compress on breasts which are sore and swollen.

TO RELIEVE DIGESTIVE DISTRESS

  1. A daily dose of 1 teaspoonful/5ml yellow dock root vinegar.

  2. A cup of yoghurt in the morning (buy it plain and add fruit at home) replaces gut flora and ensures easy digestion all day long.

About the Author:

Kylie is an author and freelance writer for modern women. She has a popular local blog called Brisbane Woman with hundreds of ladies tuning in each week for a read. Kylie had her first book published in 2005 and her next book is due for publication in 2009. She currently freelances for The Courier Mail newspaper, Brisbane Magazine and QCG Magazine. kyliewelsh.com & brisbanewoman.com

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - PMS or princess?

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Are you a stay at home parent in need of more income?

Work at Home Typing Jobs - a Growing Trend

Author: Elaine Currie

If you want to work at home and have good typing skills, working online might be right for you. A growing number of companies are hiring people to work at home typing online. Employers are waking up to the idea that they don't need to rent office space to keep their employees corralled from 9-5, and they like the idea that they can save all sorts of overheads by employing people to work at home. This arrangement benefits the bosses by saving them money and it benefits the staff by enabling them to work where they want to be: at home.





What sort of home typing jobs are available?





There is no shortage of variety for work at home typists. Work at home typing online jobs include all the clerical/secretarial roles you would expect to find in any office. There are also home typing jobs which are purely internet-based and consist of things such as typing classified advertisements into online forms for companies or typing short articles onto blogs. There is also specialised work at home typing online in fields such as medical billing and medical transcription.





Some work at home typing online jobs are, quite frankly, repetitive and boring. It is best, therefore, to consider exactly what sort of typing work you would enjoy doing day in and day out before you start actively seeking a work at home typing position. If you want easy part time work you can do at home, typing classified advertisements into online forms is an easy way to make money. You can choose your own hours and just work for a couple of hours each day. If you want something more creative, a blog posting job might be more suitable for you.





Do I need experience to get a work at home typing job?





Many work at home typing online jobs require no previous related experience and can be done by anyone with reasonable typing skills. These jobs include the classified ad typing and blog posting positions. The companies hiring people to do this sort of typing work online will provide full training and show you exactly where and how to post the ads and deal with enquiries or feedback.





The main drawback with this type of work is that there is a huge amount of competition (as there is for any work at home job). So, if you have previous experience in medical transcription or customer services, this will give you an advantage if you choose to work in one of those fields.





What about work at home typing online scams?





There are scams relating to work at home and typing online jobs have their share. Some scams are obvious and you can almost "smell" them when you see their advertisements, but others are more difficult to detect. One thing to remember is that you should ask yourself "why would anyone pay me to do that?". If you can't think of a single reasonable answer, you could be looking at a scam that will cost you money or, worse still, something that will involve you in illegal activity. If in doubt, let the dubious opportunity pass and carry on looking.

Note: I have not verified any information provided. Be certain to check any leads before committing. Amber Columbia



There are plenty of legitimate work at home typing online opportunities around for people of all levels of skill and experience, just remember to be careful to avoid scams and to pick the kind of work you will enjoy doing.


About the Author:

Elaine Currie helps people to make money online working at home and is the author of Ezine Article Writing - 10 Steps To Success

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Work at Home Typing Jobs - a Growing Trend

Monday, June 22, 2009

LOVE...LOL

5 Funny Love Poems

Author: Jay Gilbert

When most people think of love poems, they think of serious and soulful expressions of passion. Long sonnets by Shakespeare or romantic poems by Browning and Lord Byron are the norm for love poetry. However, funny love poems can be good for a laugh. They may not be romantic, but they do give your friends something to enjoy.



Some of the best funny love poems are limericks. Limericks started in Ireland and follow a standard form of five lines and a rhyme scheme of aabba. Here are a few limericks written by anonymous authors:



There once was an old man of Lyme

Who married three wives at a time

When asked "Why a third?"

He replied, "One's absurd!

And bigamy, Sir, is a crime."



There was a young fellow named Hammer

Whose had an unfortunate stammer

"The b-bane of my life"

Said he, "Is m-m-my wife

D-d-d-d-d-d-damn ‘er!"



She made friends with a young undertaker;

Her last boyfriend had forsaken her.

But she started to curse

When he turned up in a hearse.

She said next time I'll date a baker!



There was a young lady named Constance,

From boys she wouldn't stand any nonsense.

If her partners grew deft

She would lead with her left;

The results would not weigh on her conscience.



My sweetheart and I are just wed.

Already I wish I were dead.

Two weeks she's been spending.

It was time never ending.

We are thousands of pounds in the red!



Limericks are fairly easy to write if you can rhyme well, so you might try writing a limerick yourself that includes the name of your friend or loved one. This is a good way to make a funny love poem that is personalized.



You can find more information about funny poems at:

http://www.love-poems-quotes.info/funny-love-poems.html

About the Author:

Art Hill is an internet poet who operates an independant poetry publishing company.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - 5 Funny Love Poems

Life's Rhythm

Can we create rhythm in our lives?

Author: Kylie Welsh

My work involves interviewing and talking with many women. I often find one of the biggest challenges facing modern women is being able to successfully create balance in their lives.

Whether you are a high-flying career woman, a busy home maker, entrepreneurial business owner or a combination of all - finding balance is a challenge. What often sabotages this balance, is the inability to find a rhythm in our lives. Finding this rhythm means that life is in a natural flow - rather than a whirlwind of chaos, where you feel continually out of sync.

Have you ever felt like everything is just falling into place without too much effort? It is wonderful when it happens. Or perhaps life is so crazily busy but everything feels so right that you don’t mind falling into bed exhausted.

Can we keep creating this renewed feeling of passion or life force, that to me feels like life is simply ‘flowing’ in the right direction. I love that feeling, you just know you are on the right track because of it. I sometimes wonder, is this something that happens naturally though, when the time is right or do have the ability to create this feeling more?

Often in our modern lives there is too much chaos and we are trying to be experts in so many areas, sometimes we end up mastering very little. The result is feeling tired, frustrated and like we are not achieving enough. We get on a roll of believing that we are underachieving, become too competitive, feel like we should always be doing more and compare ourselves unfavourably to others.

If you have heard of the Chinese religion Taoism, the basis of this religion is about creating flow and rhythm in your life. Tao can be roughly translated to be in the flow of the universe. Even visiting a Chinese art exhibition recently, I found the experience so peaceful - there is a flow and rhythm in all the Chinese art. The simple act of observing this art made me feel peaceful.

I spoke with Joan Weir recently to see if we can create this sense of rhythm in our lives or whether to accept that it’s something that just happens naturally and we just need to ride the good tide when it does. (Joan is a qualified Personal Coach specialising in coaching women who want to succeed in life.)

The good news is we can actually create rhythm in our lives, we just need to work at it sometimes.

Joan has this to say, on how to create more rhythm in our lives.

“I attended a parent-teacher night last year where the issue of homework came up (actually I was the one to launch this rather touchy subject). After much discussion one brave parent asked, “Well, why do kids have homework?” Great question I thought.

The answer was about creating a rhythm or routine. By having to spend 20 minutes or so doing homework, the child learns the art of discipline. This quality time, compared to blobbing out in front of the TV or computer, strengthens a child’s willpower. It means they learn that having a rhythm creates results. What a great lesson for our kids!

So how does homework and rhythm apply to us?

Well, just as our kids benefit from having discipline in their lives, so do we. If we have a rhythm that we follow, we too will create results. I often see clients who aren’t consistent in their actions. I too fall into this trap too sometimes. I find that the more people stay focused on their goals and commit to doing something every day, even something small, then they achieve results much faster. They create a rhythm in their life.

For example, one client I worked with had a dream of being an artist. By being focused, she created a rhythm of painting every day. At the end of 3 months, much to her joy, she had her first exhibition booked! I’m not saying that it was easy for her, but the commitment she made to regularly paint, to be disciplined and take action every day, made a huge difference to her results. She created her rhythm.

So what are our daily rhythms?

Do we have a rhythm around handling emails? Updating our finances? What about our marketing rhythm? Do we have marketing activities we do each week or each month? Just think how much more productive we could be, if we did our “homework” and developed a daily, weekly and monthly rhythm to achieve the things we want in life.

I have learnt and seen many times over that being consistent in our actions, or keeping a rhythm, is one of the great keys to success. As Aristotle said “We are what we do repeatedly. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, it is a habit.”

Have your say…

Do you think you can create rhythm? How? When can you tell you are not in the flow? How do you get yourself back in rhythm?

About the Author:

Kylie is an author and freelance writer for modern women. She has a popular local blog called Brisbane Woman with hundreds of ladies tuning in each week for a read. Kylie had her first book published in 2005 and her next book is due for publication in 2009. She currently freelances for The Courier Mail newspaper, Brisbane Magazine and QCG Magazine.

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Can we create rhythm in our lives?

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Blogging Women

Women rule the blogosphere!

Author: Kylie Welsh

Mia Freedman

Woman are not only taking the blogging world by storm but according to a recent article in the Sydney Morning Herald, women are now ruling the blogging world!

The focus of the article is Mia Freeman, former editor of Cosmopolitan and her hugely successful blog Mumamia. Mumamia has over 300 000 monthly visits and Mia writes about fashion, celebrity, relationships and current affairs. She says the "mummy-blog" phenomenon in particular is booming in Australia, following the lead of the pioneering US mummy blog, dooce.com, which attracts more than 4 million hits a month - bigger than any magazine in the world.

Why are modern mums turning to blogging, like mothers in the past took to tennis lessons and frilly knickers? "Because we’ve lost that sense of community with our neighbours and with our extended families, people are finding it online. It can be quite isolating being a stay-at-home mother, or a mother working part-time or just a mother being up at three o’clock in the morning with a baby that won’t sleep," says Mia.

But it is not only mums who are finding blogging so liberating, many women now use their blogs as a basis to connect with other like-minded women and as a valuable tool for attracting customers to their websites, growing their businesses and raising their profiles.

Interesting statistics on women bloggers: (This research is from BlogHer and Compass Partners)

  • 35% of women aged 18 to 75 participate in the blogosphere weekly.

  • Of women online 53% read blogs, 37% post comments to blogs and 28% write or update blogs.

  • Of women bloggers 58% post entries at least weekly, and of those who actively read blogs, 80% do so at least once per week.

Why do women blog? (aside from business reasons)

  • 65% do it for fun

  • 60% to express themselves

  • 46% to get information

  • 41% to stay up to date on family and friends
  • 40% to connect with others
  • 34% as a diary
  • 28% participate in the blogosphere in order to connect with others.

My goal is to promote the breadth and variety of women’s writing and to get women writing more. A blog is a simple first step towards that. It is a wonderful tool because it is unfiltered contact with your audience and your readership will grow slowly (or sometimes very quickly) over time. For an inexperienced writer, blogging is a medium that allows you to develop your confidence along the way.

In talking to women through my journalistic work, many women love writing and have a goal of writing more. FEAR is the main reason that holds us back though. This fear is about not being a good enough writer, a fear no-one will read our work and a fear of being embarrassed. If you set up a blog and readers aren’t knocking on your door initially, no-one else will know so it doesn’t really matter. I have a friend who has a blog about her garden. She started the blog because of her passion for gardening and each week she is a little perplexed by her growing readership. You’ll be surprised how many people will also share your passion and be interested in what you have to say.

The reality is we all fear our writing will not be good enough and if we allow ourselves to always submit to this, then we’d never have the privilege of reading so much magnificant feminine literature. Watch the wonderful talk by Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love on this website and you’ll see even the most successful writers still struggle with this notion.

Just think about where would we be today without the romance of Jane Austen to get us through the lonely nights, or the passion of Emily Bronte to remind us that there is a Healthcliffe out there for all of us?

Now seriously, in the aftermath of World War 2 our fabulous female writers started creating real change. Back in 1949 French Author Simone de Beauvoir, penned - The Second Sex, the first real exploration into gender inequity. How many frustrated housewives would not have broken free of miserable marriages and terrible sex lives if they hadn’t read Germain Greer’s – The Female Unick, in the second wave of feminism (70’s). And in the next wave (90’s), Noami Wolf as she exposed the beauty industry and it’s destructive judgements upon women with her book, The Beauty Myth.

If you’d like to create change in this world and help others, then writing is undeniably a powerful phenomenon. For some real female inspiration on the power of blogging take a look at NxE’s Fifty Most Influential ‘Female’ Bloggers and Top 100 Female Bloggers by Ensha Blog.

I believe one of the best things you can do for yourself personally and professionally is to write Setting up and writing a blog is a great first step. Who knows where this may lead!

For more information please conact kylie@brisbanewoman.com or go to www.brisbanewoman.com

About the Author:

Kylie Welsh is an author and freelance writer for modern women. She has a popular local blog called Brisbane Woman with hundreds of ladies tuning in each week for a read. Kylie had her first book published in 2005 and her next book is due for publication in 2009. She currently freelances for The Courier Mail newspaper, Brisbane Magazine and QCG Magazine. www.brisbanewoman.com

Article Source: ArticlesBase.com - Women rule the blogosphere!

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